Sum of My Parts by Trujillo Olga

Author:Trujillo, Olga
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781608825707
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications

7

Once I got the hang of law school, I did very well. David and I studied together more and more often and became best friends. In my third year, David and I moved in together, and the fourth year we married. Our classmates couldn’t believe that we were willing to miss two weeks of the semester to go on our honeymoon, but we both already had jobs lined up and didn’t feel the pressure that many of the other students felt. I eventually graduated in the top 30 percent of my class, and David was in the top 15 percent. We had both gotten jobs at big law firms, making more money than people our age should.

I had never known what it felt like to be loved so well. David cared about what I thought, what I liked, and what I didn’t like. He did things I liked to do just so we could spend more time together. He had never been a runner or even a morning person before he met me, but he often got up at 5:30 a.m. to run with me. He hadn’t been much of a football or basketball fan either, but after we married he would sit with me all Sunday afternoon in the fall watching football teams he didn’t really care about. And during March Madness he would pull out the schedule in the paper and fill out his picks. We’d hang on every close game.

As I watched David enjoy himself doing things I cared about, I felt so good inside—almost a feeling of joy. At the time I didn’t know why it was so compelling. But now I know that all the parts that I instinctively created to function well in my day-to-day life felt good to be the center of his attention. We all got to do things with him. I often thought, I am so lucky to have found someone who wants to be with me so much. I’m not alone anymore.

I did the same for David, cultivating an interest in things he enjoyed. He loved playing chess and wanted me to play with him. He always won, but I often came close. This also filled me with positive thoughts: David wants me to play with him. He has lots of friends that he could visit and hang out with. He wants me. When he wanted to start playing golf, I was right there with him, and inside I was thrilled. Every Sunday morning, bright and early after our daily run, we were at the driving range or the golf course. We often used it as an excuse to get together with friends from law school.

Still, there were wrinkles in my newfound happiness, things I struggled with for reasons I couldn’t explain. Controlling my environment was still a compelling need for me. I did everything I could to not be surprised by anything. When I’d lived with roommates, I always tried to nail down plans and predict any possible changes to those plans in an attempt to have control over my life.

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